2016 m. liepos 3 d., sekmadienis

Saudade. Concert. Blank. Dawson Creek.


This is crazy. Never felt like that. Happy because of the little: - what are you doing?
p.s. I hope nobody will find this. Because the second dragon said: - No.
I lost all symbols because of that. I lost my peaceful sleep stories. I just want to write everything as it is. Fact to fact.
But this makes me believe the destiny again. My beliefs were lost. I am alive. This is agony. I am alive. I am online 24/7. My destiny was around 3000km away and now just 100km. It was working before so how it is possible that it is not working now.
"Pushing away is not the same as letting go". I am stupid, I have faith.

It is enough for me to know that I love you.

2016 m. gegužės 24 d., antradienis

Headphones. Miss ya. Jan28/Jan29.

This is the day. 2016 May 24/25. The day. Aquarius was hurt for the first time in her life. Life is funny, huh? Aquarius was hurt by Aquarius. They have never slept together. They have never been on a date. They have never known each other. But she feels like she died. She always feels taller. Because she is. She always feels older and smarter. Because she is. This time she was one day younger, one cm smaller and one day less reading was done in her life. Minutes are going and every minute that past she can not grow more than, can not learn more than, can not feel less inlove. Karma you say. As all Aquarius says"You are what you eat." Her EGO was hurt. But she still feels pretty while crying. The love that she gathered over all those 27 years for every man she met, every creature that made her feel something is gone. White canvas again. She feels clean.

She will keep one thing. Poem.

Looking up at the stars, I know quite well
That, for all they care, I can go to hell,
But on earth indifference is the least
We have to dread from man or beast.

How should we like it were stars to burn
With a passion for us, we could not return?
If equal affection cannot be,
Let the more loving one be me.

Admirer as I think I am
Of stars that do not give a damn,
I cannot, now I see them, say
I missed one terribly all day.

Were all stars to disappear or die,
I should learn to look at an empty sky
And feel its total dark sublime,
Though this might take me a little time.