Apples. Jams.Vinyls. White label. Max. Death by chocolate.

It rules the world. You know who (let’s call it alive creature). I can swear that she knows too. Always starts with coffee cup, you can’t find a start without that. Consist of all of us, in the air, we smell, blows up our heads. Blows us! Second it’s silk. Without silk it’s not worth a crown. Red, pink, essential, scream, cream, dream machine. I have shelves for days and draws too: 5 days to shine, 2 days to die. Do it your first time in public it will be emotion, cause when you start indoors projects it become feelings. Then I will be your own counting Amelia, I want big numbers. Have one huge walking emotion. I’m laughing so hard. We are trying not to write something erotic or pornographic, but a comedy, so grand comedy. You say: if I will invite you to come over? I say: maybe you can invite your gf to come over. You say : text me I say: you text me, after 20minutes you wrote: I don’t have your number and can swear that you don’t have mine. You listen Moby, finishing lasagna, deleting messages. I am doing manicure, knitting, watching Cupid.

It’s mind terrorism. Trying to do parapsychology to force to say facts: I want, I wish, I will do, I will go. It won’t work! Hear that sentence: won’t work!

It could work today to leave scar. No gossips. And who am I kidding.

Skinny. Blondie. I do not like your red sofa, prefer blue bar.

Bar. Tonic. Off shoulder. Dance with me.

Heart skipped a beat. No response.

Heart still skips it but pretends. It looks like it does not know what love is. Brain repeats that word as it is trying to remember something.

Want to write a book about our story. Our? My story. I live in it alone. I created a novel. I live in a novel.

Ending is going to look like this " They looked old, but where feeling in their thirties. Sat on their porch holding hands and tried not to regret spending life separately. They were present. That moment was a gift. It was perfect timing. It was planned by destiny. Life was cruel. That love was pure and needed that timing. There is no perfection. No idile. But that was close. She was still not broken Aquarius and it was first time that he had nothing to say."

I have not told to anyone that I met you. Not going to. This is going to be a little secret. It looks like I have you lock you further down. Never going to forget. Hoping that you are going to forget me.

all memories safe kept in white vine bottle.
Forget it forget it forget it.

still waiting for that miracle which happened while singing j'ai cru entendre. "Hope is good for breakfast but bad for dinner." When i will learn to use these thousands of sayings in head..

What is fashion, your morning cup, your bed and heels, when on every corner is advert: "They shoot single people don't they?" But real purpose is not being

Saudade. Concert. Blank. Dawson Creek.

This is crazy. Never felt like that. Happy because of the little: - what are you doing?
p.s. I hope nobody will find this. Because the second dragon said: - No.
I lost all symbols because of that. I lost my peaceful sleep stories. I just want to write everything as it is. Fact to fact.
But this makes me believe the destiny again. My beliefs were lost. I am alive. This is agony. I am alive. I am online 24/7. My destiny was around 3000km away and now just 100km. It was working before so how it is possible that it is not working now.
"Pushing away is not the same as letting go". I am stupid, I have faith.

It is enough for me to know that I love you.

Headphones. Miss ya. Jan28/Jan29.

This is the day. 2016 May 24/25. The day. Aquarius was hurt for the first time in her life. Life is funny, huh? Aquarius was hurt by Aquarius. They have never slept together. They have never been on a date. They have never known each other. But she feels like she died. She always feels taller. Because she is. She always feels older and smarter. Because she is. This time she was one day younger, one cm smaller and one day less reading was done in her life. Minutes are going and every minute that past she can not grow more than, can not learn more than, can not feel less inlove. Karma you say. As all Aquarius says"You are what you eat." Her EGO was hurt. But she still feels pretty while crying. The love that she gathered over all those 27 years for every man she met, every creature that made her feel something is gone. White canvas again. She feels clean.

She will keep one thing. Poem.

Looking up at the stars, I know quite well
That, for all they care, I can go to hell,
But on earth indifference is the least
We have to dread from man or beast.

How should we like it were stars to burn
With a passion for us, we could not return?
If equal affection cannot be,
Let the more loving one be me.

Admirer as I think I am
Of stars that do not give a damn,
I cannot, now I see them, say
I missed one terribly all day.

Were all stars to disappear or die,
I should learn to look at an empty sky
And feel its total dark sublime,
Though this might take me a little time.

Permanent. Ocean blue. Stick and stones. Puzzle for birthday.

I blame you " Pig who wanted to be eaten" to put me in this position to show the pink elephant in the room. The elephant looks like an orange bird when you press it become so huge that destroys everything around. And what about my unicorn in this position? Is he it? Or just the horse that starts the story and when you asked a girl: " How the horse looks like? " She says: " It is a unicorn". How you should react.

"Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of witnesses."

The little one wants to be called like that. Wants a candy now and the brown pot with a food left waiting in the kitchen. But Mrs. Drama can not get the little one that. It needs to take out freedom, to leave chaos. To give no mercy, just nightmares that little one can be caught on the corner.

Alone at 3 at night? Non. I have me. I understand me. I understand my wish. I understand my thoughts. I understand my body. My mind. My heart. My belly. My butterflies. My eyes. My flesh. Egoist-individualist.

She said. Lion. Somebody else. Let me know you. Little bird whispered to me. Furious. Spectrum.

Have you ever made a lie that made you make one more? Your soul was feeling so weak, but adrenaline was going in to your brain saying to move more, to do more, to be real you more. The bad you.

To spend everything you have, that you build after the years. It makes the house. It should


Spoke about how time is passing fast and thinking how i am little to be able to handle the pressure to stand tall. The heat hits the brain, when the degress comes and hits more. When one thing is left to sit at balcony and wait until after half an hour you have to pretend in the mood.

- Girls have needs too. - But there is a reason you are called ladies.


"No man really becomes a fool until he stops asking questions."